Reflections

Some thoughts for a young mom looking for 'me time' and wondering how to survive the days with a baby and a toddler in the house.

When mine were that little, 'me time' was a matter of focus, not of time. My husband left for training with the military when our second daughter was 11 months old and returned just before her second birthday. For several months before that he was gone from 6:30 am til 9:00 pm most days. So I learned pretty fast to get creative and to adjust my thinking. These are just my thoughts but hopefully there is something in here somewhere that will help or encourage you

3:00 am feedings. You can look at it as a frustrating interruption to your sleep or a chance to have a quiet sit and snuggle with your baby, to pray if you want to, or to read a little bit if you're nursing and have a book there next to your chair. I stopped getting frustrated by those awakenings and started instead to focus on being thankful that my baby needed me, that I was able to meet her needs in a way that no one else could, and embracing those quiet moments. 

A daily shower. For me that had to be non-negotiable, from the day our first daughter was born. When he was home, I would have my husband take care of the kids in the evening while I had time to take a shower or a bath. But most days he was gone before we were up. My strategy then was to just put her in her car seat or bouncer in the bathroom while I took my shower. When she got a little older, I would let her play on the bathroom floor. When I had a five-year-old and a two-year-old, I would let them play in the next room while I had bathroom time, with the door open to hear them. 

Exercise. You can either focus on the elusive and nearly impossible goal of getting time out by yourself, or you can change your strategy and take your kids with you. Get a two seater wagon or jogging stroller or bike trailer or whatever suits you, and just get out there. You're getting exercise, they're getting fresh air, and you're being a great role model.  (Look for a mommy-and-me fitness class if you'd rather something with added structure and motivation.)

Bedtime. Make sure they have a fixed bedtime and a routine to get them there. Choose their bedtime to suit YOUR needs. If you really crave alone time in the morning, then keep your kids up later and let them sleep in. If you want quiet in the evening, put them to bed early. Just realize you can't have it both ways... if you put them to bed early, don't you go and stay up til 1:00 reading, because they ARE going to be up early.


These are just some thoughts for you... above all else, keep in mind that this stage passes by SO fast. If you don't get a lot of time alone, make the most of the moments you do have, and enjoy the time you have with your kids. Before you know it they'll be headed off to this or that, then asking for the keys, then moving on... and you'll miss those midnight baby snuggles.